Proclamation no 34213 of the Order Of Zor
From his most holy-ish majesty
The Lord of Zor
A few days back, I, Lord Akoroth, went through a small phase of self doubt. Recruitments have been at an all-time low and my coffers are empty.
So I sent the Record Keeper around to conduct a small survey asking you why the Order of Zor was so stagnant.
I received some creative responses. I have considered all your suggestions and I have distilled the gist of them below.
You have told me that the Order needs to be more mainstream because it is boring to listen to the thoughts of the Order or to be asked to think.
You have reminded me that talking about branjelina, the latest movies, Twilight, Indo-Pak relations, the sexual habits of various mammals etc is the only possible definition of interesting.
You have assured me that this will make the Order stand out from the crowd because we will be the only people talking about what everyone on the planet is talking about.
You have also informed me that we should make the Order simple and easy to understand, possibly with the help of pictures.
You say we should explain everything in great depth and detail with multiple, cross-cultural references and easily graspable examples so that the greatest mass of people can understand our writings to the greatest possible extent without having experience that most horrible of sensations – the slightly different thoughts of another brain.
You say the expectation that human beings will actually think, interpret satire or be willing to look at this world in a unique manner, is expecting too much.
Who has heard of random people coming up with a concept that made them world-famous after all?
Some of you have taken me to the side and, with hearty chuckle, explained that the very idea that the Order could have ‘ideas’ is sweet, but a bit childish. You have sternly advised me that it is time for the Order to leave the ideas to the ‘idea’ people and grow up.
Others amongst you have tried to be encouraging, telling me that the Order should give up these childish fantasies of being ‘somebody’ and try to get noticed by a ‘somebody’ instead, which would be the more sensible thing to do.
My people, I have considered your suggestions and the path that this Order should take becomes so obvious.
Here is my answer to your suggestions –