Kanda survives brush with death (thank god!)

I have often found it amazing how strong and frail the human body can be.

There might be times when a person besides you is as firm as a rock one moment and a crumpled heap on the floor in the next.

Hey. It is known to happen.

I am guessing that the scientific definition would probably be – Sudden Health failure And Transfer to hospital Anomaly (makes a nice acronym)

Gopal Kanda

So it should come as no surprise to anyone that poor Gopal Kanda has finally succumbed to his situation. Yes, even though the spirit of the brave politician from Harayana remains strong, his body can no longer walk with him. (Or at all apparently.)

Kanda however did not go down without a fight. His inner fortitude gave him the strength to spend ONE FULL night and HALF A DAY in jail…

…Before he finally broke, complained of ‘chest pains’, and was wheeled off from his cell into the prison hospital.

A quick check-up was presumably made by the crack team of doctors in the prison who, upon analyzing his critical and life-threatening condition, diagnosed it as…

“His blood pressure was noticed to be high,”

Da fuk?…err…I mean…OH MY GOD HE WAS NEARLY DEAD!

Why couldn’t it have been kidney failure, liver failure, multiple organ failure, asthma, cholera, dysentery, malaria, heart attack (always a crowd-puller) or something else similarly mild and easily fixable through pills and drips?

Why did it have to be noticeably high blood pressure? Why god why? That also to a VVIP like Kanda?

And he used to be such a strong, strong man too.


Although, I must admit, I do find his condition slightly baffling. You see, when I randomly Googled for medical advise on how to control blood pressure…

(Yes I take all my medical advise from Google, don’t pretend like you don’t)

this random site told me that the best way to control high-blood pressure was to exercise regularly and control your diet.

Now one would think that spending 12 days being completely ‘untraceable’ by the police of the great state of Haryana would give anyone plenty of exercise. (The cops certainly seemed to be running around here, there, everywhere)

And wouldn’t the famous dal and roti of prison be a low-fat, low-sodium diet anyway?

But maybe Kanda spent that time in a hole and perhaps menus have changed in prison since I last visited.

Who knows? I am not, after all, a trained doctor.

But with the possibility of bail around the corner, all evidence mostly destroyed and the prosecution’s lack of any case whatsoever, I am sure we all hope that Kanda somehow finds the motivation to lounge about in the prison hospital until he is finally released shortly.

Chin up Kanda. The girl is dead anyway. It will be over soon!

PS: You know who should learn from Kanda?

Kannada actor Darshan. He only managed to cross the threshold of the Bangalore jail before he collapsed, weak from a variety of diseases.

Though he was perfectly capable of beating his wife, burning her with cigarettes, shoving a gun in her face and finally smashing her face in with the same gun just a few hours earlier.

Luckily various stars of the Kannada film industry valiantly leapt to his defense and managed to get him shifted to a super-specialty hospital in a few short hours.

*Spoiler – he lived.

Learn something from your betters Darshan. One day is the dignified time period.

PPS: What the fuck is ‘noticed to be high’ anyway?

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